Who I’ve Become

Welcome to the I Love Me! Carnival!

This post was written for inclusion in the I Love Me! Carnival hosted by Amy at Anktangle. This carnival is all about love of self, challenging you to lift yourself up, just for being you.

Please read to the bottom to find a list of submissions from the other carnival participants.

Iguazu Falls, Brazil – October 2003

Pale skin that should be tan.
Dark body hair that needs to be waxed.
Brittle nails that won’t grow long.
Sweaty pits that limit what I feel comfortable wearing.
Soft belly that jiggles too much.
Frizzy hair that should be ironed straight.

When I was 17, that’s what I saw when I looked in the mirror.
In comparison to my peers, I probably had a very healthy, self-image. I never struggled with my weight or eating healthy. I played sports, but more for the social element than the exercise. I never worried about the size of my clothes as long as they fit well.

How has society led young women to believe that being different, BEING NORMAL, is a bad thing?

Each phase of life brings about physical changes and I firmly believe that it is up to me to embrace each phase. At 17, I didn’t know what I had – I was fit, healthy, vibrant. Had I not focused on all that I should change about myself, how much happier would I have been?

In college, while dating and then marrying my husband my view changed …
Pale skin because I protect it from the sun.
Dark body hair because I have Swiss heritage and look much like my Grammy.
Brittle nails that I keep trim and short so I don’t have to worry or spend money on them.
Sweaty pits that I grew out of – God bless hormone changes :)
Soft belly that stretched to grow and birth my daughter.
Frizzy hair that looks beautiful in a soft wave rather than stick straight.

Engagement Photos – June 2007

Much of life is about perspective. Taking the negative, self-depleting thoughts and turning them into something beautiful.

It is my hope and prayer that I can instill positive thinking in my daughter early on. My parents constantly highlighted my beauty – both inner and outer – but societal norms still have a way of sneaking up on the most innocent of hearts. I hope I can guard her from that harm, while exposing her enough to realize the ugly truth of being a cookie cutter girl. If I’m a mama who loves myself and I raise a daughter who loves herself too – perhaps we can help lead a generation of change agents where differences are praised and beauty is most recognized by actions and words.

Thank you for reading this post from the I Love Me! Carnival. Please take some time to read the contributions from the other carnival participants:

(This list will be updated by the afternoon of October 28th with all the carnival links.)

  • The Art of Being Thoughtful – Becky at Old New Legacy likes that she is mostly thoughtful but wants to become more thoughtful. She shares a story that demonstrates that giving gifts doesn’t have to be expensive.
  • I love me (and running)! – Sheryl of Little Snowflakes writes about her new love of running and how it has helped her learn to love herself!
  • For the Love of Moe – Valerie at Momma in Progress shares her thoughts on a body forever changed, but forever loved.
  • Where I Find My Worth – Sarah at Parenting God’s Children shares how finding her worth in worldly things always falls short.
  • Oh Yeah, I’m Cool – Tree at Mom Grooves shares her very favorite gift and the thing she most wants to pass on to her daughter.
  • Loving – Rosemary at Rosmarinus Officinalis talks about some of the things she loves about herself – some easily, and some by choice for the sake of healing.
  • Baby Strikes A Pose – Emma from Your Fonder Heart writes about her family’s decision not to let their 7 month old model, and uses the opportunity to think more deeply about girls (young and old) and how they determine their self-worth.
  • I Love Me! – A Rampage of Appreciation! – Terri at Child of the Nature Isle stops waiting for anyone else to tell her she is wonderful and goes on a rampage of appreciation for herself!
  • Raising Healthy Daughters – In a guest post at Natural Parents Network, Kate Wicker offers tips to pass on a healthy self-image to the young ladies in our care.
  • Unexpected Benefits of a Healthy Pregnancy – How does it feel to have a healthy pregnancy? Dionna at Code Name: Mama discovers that making positive choices can be empowering.
  • Filling Up Our Watering Cans – Nada at miniMOMist believes that practicing Sabbath is the same as being a gardener who lovingly tends to the flowers in her garden. She needs to fill up her watering can first.
  • Better Body by Baby – Jess from Mama ‘Roo and Family Too! shares how having her first baby makes her feel even more beautiful and confident about her body than ever before.
  • These Breasts Were Made for Nursing – Becoming a mother helped Mandy from Living Peacefully with Children to embrace her womanhood and improve her self image.
  • Yeah, I’m Pretty Cool – Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro writes about her own self love and how she hopes to foster the same self-respect in her children.
  • Who I’ve Become – The future is bright with That Mama Gretchen who shares her past and present perspective on body image and how she hopes to become a change agent with her daughter.
  • Ever-Evolving Me – Joella at Fine and Fair writes to her daughter about her innate drive to continue learning, growing, and evolving.
  • I love you for your mind – Lauren at Hobo Mama turns a dubious phrase on its head with a little self-loving slam poetry.
  • Stop Think of Love with Your Body – Amy of Peace 4 Parents shares an exercise to gradually transition from hating to loving your body – stretch marks, sags, imperfections, and all.
  • I Love Me! – Jenny @ I’m a full-time mummy shares the things that she loves about herself!
  • caught in a landslide – jaqbuncad of wakey wakey, eggs and bakey! shares a list of reasons why zie loves hir body.
  • Love Your Tree – How do you picture the ways your body and mind change? Amy at Anktangle writes about how trees help her have perspective about her own growth over time.
  • Pumpkin Butt – Zoie at TouchstoneZ writes about how birth and pumpkins are the way to accepting her body
  • I do love me – Shannon at Pineapples & Artichokes talks about the lessons about loving herself she wants to pass along to her daughter.
  • Appreciating Who I Am – Linni at An Unschooling Adventure describes the things she likes about herself and the way she appreciates who she is as a person.
  • I love me! : A journey – Christine at African Babies Don’t Cry shares her journey on arriving at the point where she can say: I love me!
  • My Daughter Doesn’t Care So Why Should I? – Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama calls herself on the carpet for the image of self love and beauty she portrays in front of her toddler.
  • Finding out who I am – Melissa at Vibrant Wanderings shares an exercise that helped her identify positive qualities she possesses, and how that has helped her learn to love herself.
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  1. says

    I appreciate how intentional you're being about this for your daughter's benefit. I agree completely with you that oftentimes, it takes only a small context shift, a re-framing or change of perspective to completely alter the way we think about something. It's incredible what a huge difference a small effort makes, isn't it?

  2. M Lissar says

    Such an important state of mind for you to have and to pass on to your daughter. It is a sad state for young ladies today and all the media they are exposed to with the warped values!

  3. Emma Summer says

    Whenever I think about how much my perspective on my body has changed since my teenage years, I cringe. Why, oh why couldn't I have appreciated myself more at that age? Having a daughter makes me nearly obsessed with figuring out the secret to raising girls with healthy body image and high self esteem. I think recognizing our own journey and evolution towards said goal is the first step!

  4. says

    This is so wonderful! I love the way your changed your perspective and your revised list is so sweet and beautiful, especially the part about "grammy." I have a daughter too and I know exactly what you mean. I can't protect her from what's out there, but I can give her a whole lot of me and confidence in herself from in here. I love the photos too. I'm so glad you shared them.

  5. says

    Well, we were clearly sitting next to each other as we wrote our posts! I love how you illustrate your bodily appreciation and acceptance through various stages of your life. Really unique post. Love it!

  6. ThatMamaGretchen says

    It's definitely a work in progress. Just take it one day at a time :)________________________________

  7. Linni says

    This is really wonderful and inspiring. It's great how we change our perspectives over time isn't it. Thanks for sharing your story.

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