As of today I have identified 3 surprise monsters who are hiding away in the closet of life … the big unknowns of my pregnancy.
- If our baby will be a boy or girl – I do have some control over this one, but I’m sticking to my guns and going the old-fashioned route and waiting until the little one emerges. I’m a shopper at heart so are you really that worried that I won’t end up with a enough boy or girl clothes?
- When the little one will be born – I am under the strictest belief that a due date is hodge-podge. Rarely are babies born on their due date and if I live my life by the due date I will then believe that my baby is either born too early or born too late. 80% of babies are born between 38 and 42 weeks (http://www.mothering.com/) … that is normal … I have a whole month of due dates! Hence, I believe I will have a Harvest Baby (AKA … born sometime when you can get ears of corn fresh from the market).
- Work – will I come back after the baby is born … full-time, part-time, or no-time? This I do not know and wish I did. I really don’t feel I can do well at both. I don’t think I can give 100% to Dominic, home, and motherhood without making a sacrifice. On the flip side, I know I can’t give 100% to work if I am trying to juggle family things at the same time. And knowing me, I will be a COMPLETE BASKETCASE if I try to balance both. If I have learned anything in my short, 23 years it is that there are only 24 hours in the day no matter how much you pray for 25. If it were a simple choice I would have already made it, but it isn’t. I enjoy my job, I enjoy the benefits, and I see a future here. Then those little blue lines show up on a stick and suddenly my life gets re-prioritized. Throw in the complications of unpaid maternity leave (the U.S. is way behind modern times in this category … in Canada you get 25 weeks paid, Mexico/12, Britain/18, and Japan/14 … more here) and breastfeeding and I’m in a conundrum. We’ll see where God leads … until then, I think I’m just along for the ride and right now, that’s a good place for me to be.